For many people, having others around you and being able to communicate with someone, nearly 24/7, is the standard of social norms, but for others, this can be really draining and can take a toll on their energy levels. And when confronted, they may get asked “Doesn’t that get lonely?”.
Of course, there are many different answers these people can give, and this can be confusing, for those who asked. So, here are a few reasons why being alone doesn’t always mean being lonely. So, maybe, the next time someone tells you that they’d rather enjoy a good book at home, instead of going out to brunch, or adventuring, you’ll be able to understand why.
1. “I Need To Recharge My Batteries”
Sometimes being alone can help someone “recharge their batteries”. Think about it like this. Some of us are built with a reservoir of energy that doesn’t refill on the go. They need to be “plugged in” every now and then, and by “plugging in” they’ll be able to regain the energy to interact with others.
To do this, they need to spend some time alone, whether it’s through a creative pursuit, reading a good book, watching TV, or even playing video games. By spending some time alone, they can recharge that depleted energy, and come back as energetic as before.
This is one of the main reasons people spend time alone with themselves. Of course, this mostly happens for those who are more introverted than others. Their reservoir of energy for social interactions can be used up more easily. In fact, sometimes, it’s a need.
So, if someone tells you they just need time to recharge, give them some space and allow them to feel like themselves again. Sometimes it can only take a few hours, but for others, it could take days or even weeks. Don’t rush the process, as each person experiences their recharge differently.
2. “I Prefer My Own Company”
For many introverts, it can be difficult to interact with others. Sometimes, it can be stressful to think about the right things to say, especially when conversations can be unpredictable.
For example, in one moment, you could be talking about the difference between fruits and vegetables, and the next, your friends could be talking about the challenges in the stock market. It can be difficult to keep up, but when you’re on your own, you can steer the conversation in the direction you want it to go.
This why it’s so much easier for introverts to spend time on their own, because they know their own thoughts, and they don’t have to contend with the unpredictability of others. So, they’d rather enjoy their own company, and make up their own realities, to escape from that, and recover from the stress of it.
So, if someone tells you that they’d rather be on their own, because they don’t mind their own company, it’s because interacting with others stresses them out. In fact, this could be due to other mental disorders, like social anxiety, depression or other conditions that make social interactions difficult.
3. “I Can Do What I Want To Do”
Another common reason why people like spending time on their own, is that they can do the things they want and need to do. When it comes to doing things with other people, it can be a challenge to arrange, or even keep track of. After all, you may have plans, or your friends might have plans, that clash with yours. So, you’ll need to keep rearranging, or worse cancelling those plans.
Not to mention, when you do carry out those plans, they might even change last minute. For some introverts, this can be stressful, because for them, once plans are made, they’re set. There’s no need to change them, and most certainly not at the last minute, but on those occasions when they do change, it can be stressful.
So, the better choice would be to remove that headache by doing things on their own. It’s much easier to plan for one, than more. Not only that, but once you make those plans, you can choose to keep to it, or go off the beaten path by yourself.
You can control what happens, and if something happens, you’ll know how to handle it, because you did the research, and you can predict it. That’s why being alone is not always a lonely thing, because you don’t need to plan for others, and most certainly, you won’t get stressed, because you’re in control of what happens.
4. “I Can Take My Time”
Similar to being unpredictable, sometimes, plans can go by quickly. When something is planned in a group, there can be times when those plans are jam-packed and full of activities, it can be dizzying to some people.
That’s why, some people prefer to do things on their own. When plans have been made, and a lot is going on, it can be difficult to “stop and smell the roses”, in that moment. But for those, who prefer spending their time alone, that won’t be a problem, because they don’t need to wait for someone else, or rush to keep up.
They can take their time and appreciate the things that they probably wouldn’t appreciate when out with friends. This is because, when an introvert is out in a group, they may feel responsible for everyone having a good time. So, they check in on those they’re with, and because of that, they can’t enjoy the activities as much as they’d like.
They’re too busy making sure everyone else is having fun, and that they seem engaged. This can be exhausting and stressful. So, that’s why it’s easier to do things alone. Since you aren’t with others, you won’t have to worry about them. You can simply focus on you.
Respect The Boundary
Of course, there are many other reasons why people like to spend their time alone, but these are the most common reasons. So, if someone tells you that they’d much prefer being alone, or at least they like being alone, remember, their social energy battery is low, or they’re happy to take their time doing the things they want to do, because they can predict what will happen. It’s not all about being around others and talking things out. Sometimes, it’s just because they need the time to enjoy the things around them, without the distraction of others.
