Are you searching for your other half?
How many times have you heard your friends or family refer to their partners as their other half? So many people use this term and do not realize they are speaking of themselves as if they are not a whole person. Why are you someone’s half and not a whole?
It should be two whole individuals coming together in a relationship where both parties are putting forth 100% each, not 50%. Obviously, no one will operate at 100% every single day. That is understandable. The fact is you should first fill your own cup fully before adding it to anyone else’s. That means building your life the way you want. Do all the things you want and be so happy with yourself that your happiness never becomes dependent on someone else.
Are you forgetting yourself in your relationship for the idea of having your other half?
We’ve all seen or heard of relationships where one person forgets themselves and lives basically to please the other person. Why is that? Why do the media and our society nowadays portray this flawed picture of what a relationship should look like instead of promoting couples who are whole on their own, coming together to be a power couple?
WE ARE THE GENERATION RAISED ON PHRASES LIKE: "YOU COMPLETE ME" OR YOU ARE MY EVERYTHING".
A healthy relationship isn’t made of two broken people. It should consist of two fully formed individuals with goals and plans for themselves, who are happy with who they are and the lives they lead.
Of course, the person you are when you first start dating is not the same exact person you will be as years go by because we as humans are always adapting and evolving, as we should be.
Long-term commitment is not easy, you have to choose to be with that person every single day. In the beginning, it’s really easy to get swept up in the honeymoon stage and ignore the personality traits of your partner that you know later on will bother you. Same as you likely will disguise your own bad habits that will later surface.
We have to aim to remain as authentic to ourselves as possible. It might make the initial phases of dating scarier and more vulnerable. You may also find it more difficult to connect with someone special in the first place. Rest easy though because the one who sticks around is the one who is truly compatible with the real you.
IMPORTANT THINGS TO REMEMBER
Have Your Own hobbies
You don’t need to do everything your partner does. You don’t need to have EVERYTHING in common with them. This is normal. Let’s continue to normalize it. It’s healthy to have space in the relationship and you should encourage each other to explore the hobbies you each like.
Make family and friends a priority
Don’t idolize your partner and forget where you came from. You had friends and family before your relationship so make sure to maintain those as they are part of you.
Remember Your Goals
You can have goals for yourself and have goals for the relationship you’re in but don’t set aside what you want out of life. It’s natural for your goals to change as you grow and adapt through the different stages of your life. Just don’t lose sight and get complacent after settling down.